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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Mishellie's LiveJournal:

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    Sunday, November 10th, 2002
    1:57 pm
    With Out You In My Life
    I need you
    I've never needed you so much.
    Without you I can't sleep,
    I can't eat.
    Without you my world is lost.
    I pray everyday that you'll come back to me.
    I know we're still together.
    But you're losing it.
    You won't talk about your problems.
    You won't show me affection.
    Have I done something wrong?
    Did I say something not right?
    Should you leave me,
    My heart would tear to pieces.
    Please don't leave me.
    My heart is in the palm of your hands.
    If you leave me,
    There will be nothing left.
    My heart will be torn,
    I wont be able to love again,
    I cant love without a heart.
    Should you leave me
    I will die.
    There will be no more happiness
    There will be no more tears.
    There will only be a dull ache.
    No smiles will be shown.
    No hugs will be worn.
    Should you leave me
    Ill die a thousand deaths.

    Current Mood: Heart Broken
    Thursday, November 7th, 2002
    1:01 am
    -big yawns n ish- :o) Tiredness becomes me huh? hehe J/k. Anyways.
    -burp- 'Scuse my lil ass....wait...-looks at bum-...yeah its little. lol. Ok so im hyper n tired at the same time? Someone tell me how thats possible cause I dont know how it would be. I mean its 1 am and ive been up since 8 am LASLAASKLFJDKLJFDKJG. yeahhhhhhhh buddy. anyways. oh shit. im out of smokes. thats bad. but im still hyper! yay! heh and tired! NOOOO yes i know im a nerd. anyways im headed out. i loveeeeeeeee you justin -!@#*% you- yeah buddy. :oT im out like a girl in a prom dress =X i stole that from nikki hehehehehe love you nikki-pie!@*&!!!! lol peace

    Current Mood: hyper
    Wednesday, November 6th, 2002
    11:31 am
    It's 11:30 a.m. and I've been up for 3 1/2 hrs. Pathetic huh? Yeah I know. Savannah slammed Melanies door like 3 times today so I woke up. Well I'm gonna get a job at a Factory n ish. At least I'll be making more than 6 dollars/hr. I figure if I work at a factory....I'll be busting my ass and that can just get me away from the house for at least 8 hrs a day. I really want to get on 3rd shift. I figure that way I come home round 7 am then go to bed wake up around 2 or maybe Savannah for a little bit....get someone else to come get her then have the rest of the night to talk to MY baby. heh. I really love him. Although he has his mood swings sometimes...but hey so do I. I figure if I have mood swings so can he. Sometimes are worse than others though. 'N sometimes I just could really slap him lol...but he probably feels the same way about me. O.K. so uhmmm lets see...I've been writing more poems lately. I don't know why. But yeah. All right. Here's one of my poems....If you have any comments you know what to do. Peace.

    Past to Present.

    Is the love you confess to me real?
    Or is the the love you confess to me fake?
    Like a hand caught in a grinder
    my heart is ripped apart and can never be replaced.
    My feelings for you run deeper
    than you could ever imagine
    I would kill for you.
    Would you me?
    Is it even possible that our love can be salvaged?
    Or should I give up, and never learn to love another.
    This heart of mine belongs to you.
    You hold it in the palm of your hands.
    If you could only see that my heart will never be the same without you in my life.
    Now its all changing.
    Now you see the real me.
    I'm not as horrible as you thought I could be
    Now you confess your undying love.
    Should I run?
    This love of mine will never die.
    You showed me the world.
    No I wont hide.
    No I wont run,
    I will show my true feelings.
    I will confess my love to you.
    You are the only one I want in my life.
    And I will have you til the day I die.

    Current Mood: calm
    Monday, October 28th, 2002
    3:00 pm
    hey peeps. Im tired as all hell for what reason I dont know. Well my next door neighbor is pregnant again and she keeps doing coke like its something she needs or sumfin who fuggin knows i wanna slap her n ish anyways most my time is spent babysitting for right now until Ed brings me an app. home from fuggin some factory n ish. which ill be makin good money n ish. yeah. So ima put in my college aps n ish go get everything done n over with get my license buy a car/truck, something i can drive. im trying to type with Kayley in my lap so if i mess up and dont see it dun mind it.yeah anyways im headed out Peace

    Current Mood: crappy
    Tuesday, October 1st, 2002
    6:32 pm
    Hey Hey
    Hey everyone...Long time no talk...well type. Anywho...I moved out of my moms house. I'm living with two other roommates and their daughters. I actually got my shit together. Now all I have to do is get a real good job and apply to some more colleges. Anyways. I miss mah Justin....Hes not online and I miss being with him. Hes the greatest thing thats ever happened to me. Kinda crazy how that all worked out and shit. Anways im gonna bounce so I can dance some more with savannah.

    Current Mood: crazy
    Tuesday, July 16th, 2002
    6:51 pm
    Alright so I havent written in awhile -shrugs- anyways...My day turned out to be not one of the best days in my life. First I wake up to Tim yelling at me about my alarm clock n how hes gonna smash it or something. Then he said something about my door or some ish...Iunno all i did was yell...then i went to heidis n babysat noah n that was ok i guess but then i got home n yeah....thats when things went downhill..cause thats my life story. Mmm I wanna move so bad. Its like I know I have two months til im 18 or what not...but really...I need to leave like now. Cause its just going to shit at my house... But yeah..and I miss Justin a lot...and I need him too but I guess I can wait another 3 weeks or some ish. well imma go cause i gotta go clean <3 yas -muah-

    Current Mood: indescribable
    Tuesday, May 28th, 2002
    2:35 pm
    Hmm. Ever love someone so much that you cant let them go? Yeah that's me. -Sigh- Who knows what's going on in my life...Im so confused anymore...People don't understand me and what I'm talking bout half the time. ooo but one good thing is happening....IM GRADUATING )(!@*#&*@^$!@)&$((! GO ME!!!! Thank God It's almost here. well peeps im outtie...ive got ish to do and its starting to storm again -muahs- buh byes

    Current Mood: annoyed
    Sunday, March 31st, 2002
    10:00 pm
    ahh shit
    Hey Everyone....not like a lot people look at this or nuffin...but hey. Long time since my ass last updated this ish. I forgot about it. Well let's see. Hrm. A lot of things have happened since i last wrote in here. I don't even remember what I wrote in here the last time. Pathetic. Anyways. Lets see. Last week I joined the Navy, im not getting along with my mom right now, my sister has been getting on my last nerves, and people dont know how to pick up a friggin phone and say 'hey im ok dont worry bout me' but hell thats life right? right. So im really excited about this navy thing. I get shipped out oct 2nd. my birthday is Sept. 24th so I will be 18 even before I ship out...Thank God for that one. At least I get to go clubbin with Shelene and Beth and all the girls. Eh. I even get to look like a whore before they chop off all my hair and make me look like a boy. Well uhm Ill write more later cause im bored and tired and just not having the time of my life right now so peace ya'll im outtie. 1. ~Michelle~

    Current Mood: bitchy
    Sunday, December 23rd, 2001
    5:13 pm
    ::yawns: damn people keepin me up till 7in the morning thos bises =X im so tiredddd i slept in till 3...imma lazy ass...i would have slept longer but steve woke me up so i could watch kylie while they went christmas shopping. ::dances around: i miss my nikkkkkiiiiii i dont get to talk to her that muchhhhhh and it sucks so much!! im so bored =X i baked 8 batches of cookies last night 8! i am so cookied out =X i know im weird :oT my love cause im reallllllll llalala i need to moveeeeeee really baddddddddddd. thank god im outta school this year muwahaha =X alright im outta here love ya all..thanks for lisenin to my boring life.

    Current Mood: flirty
    Saturday, December 22nd, 2001
    12:00 am
    hey hey
    long time no type eh? uh huh i a lazy bitch. sorry to disappoint you but i have a lot going on in my life right now. Im working at now im a fresh and easy girl...dont ask. its not to be taken that way. i miss nikki a lot..i hardly ever get to talk to her anymore...kind of makes me sad ;\ but thats the way life is right now. i know i can always count on her though. Which is the best thing for me, cause anytime im sad all i have to do is go pick up the phone and dial her number, im pathetic...ive got it memorized and everything. heh but shes my best friend, so what do u expect. well im suppose to not talk to justin n whatever but i still in love with him. i talked to him about it. asked him if he was in love with me...wanna know what he said? yes and no....he said he hasnt talked to me in blah blah im the same old chellies tho ::shrugs:: oh well im outtie for now buh byes n muahs

    Current Mood: blank
    Sunday, October 21st, 2001
    8:59 pm
    "Its over and done but the heartache lives on inside and who is the one you clinging to instead of me tonight and where are you that i need you tears on my pillow..." ::tears::

    Current Mood: rejected
    Wednesday, October 10th, 2001
    9:08 pm
    whats up?
    Hey All. I'm so friggin bored and i got like 20 things to do for homework but im gonna do it in study hall. Im sicky again too but when am i not sicky. i think its cause i ate too much. sooooooo bored...and my shelly is leaving me tomorrow. She has to fly to her sisters house. Im gonna pray for her. =\ i hope everything goes alright. She should be fine. I told her to call if she gets the chance.

    Current Mood: tired
    Friday, September 28th, 2001
    3:37 pm
    im not feeling too well...
    hey all...what's up? Not a whole lot here. Just being sick like always. my throat hurts =\and i cant swallow...there goes my day job haha not really. Anyways...not a lot has happened this past month...besides the stupid terrorist shit but lets not even go into that acus that would just anger me once again. lalala.....hmm....i lub mah justin....thats all i can tell ya. He's a sweet. :oT And! imma go visit him soon! =X did i say that? ::looks around and whistles:: hehe anyways im outties lub ya'll bye

    Current Mood: blah
    Wednesday, September 26th, 2001
    5:51 pm
    happy late birthday to meeee
    okies so monday...the 24th...was mah birthday...I had fun I guess? Anyways...i'm so friggin bored. man im tellin ya i have nuffin to do right now. thats gonna change tho...lalala i talked to mah step daddy and he said that hes gonna pay for my physical AND! im gonna work oh yeah uh huh ::dances:: lalala sowwie im happy :oT anyways im bout ready to bounce and i lub justin! just thought i would let u know =X im outties buh byes ::muahs::

    Current Mood: awake
    Saturday, September 8th, 2001
    12:10 pm
    oh so tired damnit and bored and uhmm uhmm just here i guess. I needa get rid of this damn cold. So....sup everyone? there isnt really anything new going on in mah life. im bored as all hell a course i always am. i needa call beth and have her come get me or sumthin. love yall im outtie

    Current Mood: tired
    Thursday, September 6th, 2001
    7:14 pm
    Yeah i know i havent written in this thing for a LONNNNGGGGGGG time but hey...i've been busy and havent had time to think about writing in it. Okies so i wanna know something. What do you think about abortion. I think that it is disgusting and revolting. I think that people who have abortions need to realize that there is a living thing inside them. Why would you want to kill something so small and innocent. I could never do it. Just cause you might be raped or molested doesnt mean you have to have an abortion. That little fetus inside of you is apart of you. Something that will remain apart of you for the rest of your life. I'm sorry but it's true. And i'm not meaning to put people down or anything, because i understand that this would be hard on someone...very hard. But just think about how many Women in the world would love to have a baby..but they cant because of their body having something wrong with it. Just because a friend might say "go do that blah blah" doesnt mean you have to follow through on it. Guys are all like well its not my body so it would be her choice. Dont they understand that what is inside of her is apart of them too? Dude just tell me what you think of it. I would love to get comments from anyone.

    Current Mood: determined
    Saturday, August 25th, 2001
    8:06 pm
    Ya know i really am hating live journal right now! I swear fix the damn thing! I love reading other peoples comments and i'm sure they like reading mine BUT damn man its been awhile since I could see anyones comments cause the damn things either overloaded or your damn matience shit is up. GRRRR and if they dont fix the damn thing im not gonna write in it anymore. Erm well good news! M__ and I hehe uhmm he likes me a lot and i like him hes just gonna fix a few problems and maybe we will be together later ::shrugs:: who knows Love ya all ::muahz::

    Current Mood: annoyed
    8:05 pm
    Ya know i really am hating live journal right now! I swear fix the damn thing! I love reading other peoples comments and i'm sure they like reading mine BUT damn man its been awhile since I could see anyones comments cause the damn things either overloaded or your damn matience shit is up. GRRRR and if they dont fix the damn thing im not gonna write in it anymore. Erm well good news! M__ and I hehe uhmm he likes me a lot and i like him hes just gonna fix a few problems and maybe we will be together later ::shrugs:: who knows Love ya all ::muahz::

    Current Mood: annoyed
    Thursday, August 23rd, 2001
    10:09 pm
    I don't know why...Don't ask me why...but..i've been thinking about Austin lately. I miss him a lot. For those of you who don't know who Austin is...he's my friend that died 3 years ago. He got into a bad accident on the road next to my house. He was out one night with his friends and the story supposidly goes like this..2 girls in the back of the van and Austin and his bestfriend were up front. Austin was in the passengers side. Hes the only one that was wearing a belt well Jordan(austins b/f) had passed out and they ran into a tree. Well Austin got the direct hit...They said that they couldnt pull him out cause he had parts of the dashboard in his tummy. Well i never really got to say bye to him. Funny how life goes...ya never know whats gonna happen next. Well I dont really wanna talk about this right now. It's just gonna make me cry so bubi for now.

    Current Mood: depressed
    3:06 pm
    oh yeah...
    Hiyee Justin...sorry I forgot to say hi but i was bishing....Hiyee Nikki Lubbers ya...Hiyee Shane...lubbers ya too...AND Hiyee Bethers...heck i love you all buh bye now ::MuahZ::
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